Thursday, 18 November 2010

On Looking at Skyline from a Different Perspective

So, you’re an alien who likes to eat brains. You and your alien pals have travelled the universe eating brains and you come across this little planet called Earth. You do your research and realise that these ‘humans’ need their brains (although not for making Skyline) and aren’t going to give them up easily, so you decide to invade. Using your clever light/tractor beam technology and advanced weaponry you attack Los Angeles. Initially you’re all really successful and eat loads of brains, but then the pesky army attack and blow up your mother ship! So now you’ve got to use a lot of energy to rebuild your ship, which makes your carbon footprint huge. You like to eat brains sure, but you still care about the environment. Anyway, you rebuild your ship and suck up a load more humans, decapitate them and eat their brains. Remember to recycle their bodies.

But wait, what’s this; your alien pal has just eaten a brain that looked a little off. The others were all blue and this one was redder. Damn, you know what happened; he’s eaten the brain of someone who’s survived several attacks and has absorbed some of your alien powers and now his brain’s all weird and stuff and tastes like pumpkin. Now your alien pal has taken on the characteristics of the human whose brain he just ate. This is messed up. There’s nothing you can do, so you just watch as he hears the screams of his pregnant girlfriend who is about to get decapitated and kill the alien about to eat her. This is going to be a pain in the ass when you have to explain this to human resources. What’s this? It looks like his human girlfriend can recognise him; he’s stroking her pregnant stomach! This is getting really weird. We better end it here and not explain what happens next...

Take Independence Day (1996), War of the Worlds (2005) and District 9 (2009). Remove any talent, especially acting and writing and what do you get...Skyline.

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